I have a cousin I grew up with, a Vietnam War combat vet, who’s mad at me because he thinks I’m a leftwing snowflake who’s insufficiently patriotic. I have a friend of more than 40 years who’s mad at me because she thinks I’m too rightwing. Can I possibly be both of these things at once?
This political climate in America is really making people crazy. I would never throw a friend out of my circle of intimacy simply because of his political beliefs. (Well, maybe Hitler, but then, he wouldn’t have been my friend in the first place.) Also, what does “leftist” or “rightwing” even mean anymore? One of my arguments over the years has been that being pro-cop isn’t a rightist thing or a leftist thing, it’s an American thing. When I was growing up, everybody supported cops: Republicans, Democrats, southerners, northerners, Blacks, Whites, Asians, Puerto Ricans (I grew up in New York City), Jews, Christians, you name it. It’s only been in recent decades that being anti-cop got equated with being liberal, or vice versa. So if I support cops, and I’m also pro-gay, pro-abortion, pro-environment, pro-union, pro-science, pro-higher taxes on the rich, does that make me a right winger?
Obviously not, which is why we have to move beyond these petty, limiting labels. My friend Seneca Scott refers to “post-partisan” politics, which is a good way of putting it. One of the ugliest problems with our current system of “you’re either leftist or rightwing” is that lots of people fear that if they express their pro-cop views, their friends and family will perceive them as MAGA. This is a form of self-censorship: people censor themselves because they don’t want to be shunned by their loved ones. I can’t imagine a worse way to run a society, where people are afraid to express their true views.
I believe far more people support cops than is generally believed, or is reported by media outlets like the San Francisco Chronicle. As a lifelong journalist myself, I know the temptation in reporting is to find the shrillest voice in violent opposition to something and quote it, implying that that person is representative of huge numbers of people when, in fact, the truth is quite the opposite. You see this every time there’s a “protest” somewhere. Eight people show up at a public place chanting and carrying signs. A reporter and camera crew rush to the scene. That evening, the T.V. news implies that the “movement” behind the protest is widespread when it was just eight people with a grudge who had nothing better to do for a couple hours.
My cousin, who thinks I’m a flaming cop hater (can you imagine that!!?), and my old friend, who thinks I wear a red MAGA hat and send money to Trump, are both victims of this irrationality. If you must identify the precise politics of your friends, you should at least have a chat with them and ask their opinion on a wide variety of topics. But why would you base your friendship on the way somebody feels about a single issue? It’s like “If you’re a Chiefs fan I can never talk to you again because I’m a 49ers guy.” How dumb. How stupid. Why cut ourselves off from friendship because we view the world in “friend-or-enemy” mode?
I deny being rightwing; my readers know the truth about that. At the same time, I utterly, completely support cops, who I think are among our finest public servants. I have nothing but scorn for the likes of Cat Brooks and Carroll Fife, but that doesn’t mean I don’t agree with some of their positions. One of the things I dislike about them is their intellectual rigidity; for instance, I don’t think either of them would ever say they agree with me on anything. They divide the world into black and white, so to speak: you’re either with us, or against us. Well, that’s an immature, divisive way of seeing things. We are each of us many different things; those who know us, or think they do, perceive us through a prism of their own making, but that prism can distort reality. I try not to do that. Let’s disagree on the things we disagree on, and agree where we can, but let’s not throw the baby out with the bathwater and cut off friendships based on political disagreements. I am, of course, disappointed in both my cousin and my old friend, and if they feel there’s no room for me in their lives, so be it. At the same time, I pity them.
Please have a great, happy and above all safe weekend! Back on Monday.
Steve Heimoff